Wednesday, September 7, 2011

The President Called

If the President actually did call me for advice: I am in italics & POTUS is in red

Ring Ring


Donald Flad


Please hold for the President

Excuse me

The President is on the line and he would like to speak to you.

I stand up and straighten my shirt for some reason

Hello Donald, it’s Barack

Yes sir

I heard that you think I should call you because I am not living up to your expectations.

Well sir, I never said that

But that was your point

Well sir in fact I do have some advice.

I hear some muffed discussion (I think the President is covering the mouth piece but I hear a little)

“Not now Joe I’m talking to that Flad guy you like” “Yes, Joe I will tell him you said hello” “No, Joe I am not going to ask him about the money he and Jeff Parks owes you”

Sorry Donald you still there?

Yes sir – May I sit down?

Why are you standing?

I am speaking to you

I am not in the room so the standing up thing is not necessary

Thank you sir

Are you always this formal?

Well… I am speaking to the President of the United States.

I have ordered the Secret Service to keep the Vice President out of the office so you have my undivided attention.

If I were advising you about your Thursday speech; I would not make it.

Really why?

The Republicans have ruined Joint Sessions speeches with their “You lying” and tweeting that you hate your country during them. You might as well be speaking before a group of high school kids.

I have spoken to high school kids and believe me they are more attentive.

I would do this:

Fuck Congress – Go over their head – speak directly to the people.

Make the same speech over and over again for 24 hours and not always in a setting comfortable for you.

On the front steps of the New York Stock Exchange – Talk about jobs on the door step of those who claim to create them.

South Philly – These folks are Democrats but they have not always been supportive of black candidates

Nashville – one of the buckles in the Bible belt – the stars will be there to support you and you will reach the country western market – a quick side trip to Memphis and a BBQ shack along the Mississippi.

Kansas City and add some Harry Truman quotes

Omaha – Warren Buffet likes you and he wants you to succeed –ask him to introduce you before a lecture

Salt Lake City – You will get 13 votes in Utah but the Mormon’s are polite and respectful – stage a rally on the BYU campus – You are the President – They would not dare turn you down

Texas – Where is W building his library? Speak on that campus

Denver – You won’t fill the stadium again but remind them about the important part they played in your nomination

Arizona – Piss on John McCain

San Diego – Issa’s base and a pretty conservative town

Alaska – go there – Speak there – you will get a bigger crowd than the quitter and may be able to bring Murkowski over to our party if you play you cards right

Hawaii – you are home – fill the stadium after you spend 24 hours hanging out with the service members on base – bring them with you to the speech

Fly back to DC and walk your job creating bill up the steps of the capital and hand it to the Speaker of the House and the Majority Leader of the Senate

Sunday, September 4, 2011

The President Should Call Me

DonaldFladjr Donald Flad Jr

I wonder if I can go all day without watching or reading current event/news/politics? I am worn the "F" out & disgusted

I tweeted this Thursday during a break at work.

When 5:00 rolled around I asked my guy to turn off Chris Matthews, we didn’t watch the local news and instead of watching Brian Williams we watched Curb Appeal. Thursday was so successful that I continued the little challenge into Friday and when that went well I tried into Saturday. I did watch a little CNN Saturday before work but there was so little actual news I don’t believe I cheated.

The only news I received was from my Twitter feed. If I depended on that for news I would think that Barack Obama would be King of the World and all the Republican candidates are off the wall crack pots. Well, half of that is true; Obama is not King of the World.

What caused my frustration and disgust? What made me turn my back on Chris, Brian, Anderson and Mika? Who made me avoid reading Arianna, Joan, Maureen, Frank and Tina?

Barack H. Obama.

Yes the man I have spent the last 3+ years defending, supporting, explaining, encouraging patience for and believing that he will make a difference.

I explained that he was following the rules set out by the constitution in his approach to overturning DADT & DOMA.

I defended the no drama Obama, not an angry black man approach to his opponents.

I supported his ramping up operations in Afghanistan and thought his approach to Libya was smart.

I justified his compromises on health care reform.

I knew he could not be the first President to allow the nation to default.

I accused his opponents of being racists and called out their hypocrisy when they criticized him for doing the same things his predecessor(s) have done.

And, I will continue to come to his defense but I am tired and this week after all the months of seemingly rudderless leadership, listless public appearances and cold and emotional appeals to national unity he had a chance to slam dunk the Republicans.

Eric Cantor, an earthquake and a hurricane gave the President and his party a chance to really win the week and begin to bring the debate back around to our terms. Democrats are the party that believes government can make a difference and improve people’s lives. FEMA was continuing to get high marks; Secretary Napolitano was all over the media and handling the various crises with professionalism and care. The King Memorial was opening and the media was discussing how far we have come, we were getting ready for the 10th anniversary of 9-11 which was surely to bring the nation together for a brief moment and Rick Perry, Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachman under the guidance of Rush Limbaugh were stepping all over each other to be more extreme and people were beginning to the think that one of these loons may become President and getting a little concerned.

And, what did the smartest person in the room do? He started a pissing match by asking to have yet another speech to the nation scheduled at the same time as a Republican debate. He looked small, he looked petty and he looked like just any other grandstanding politician. On top of all that he lost the pissing match and once again had to back down.

Why? What was the point of this? What was the purpose? What were they thinking? Where is the person in the room who says “Snap out of it!”? I thought Bill Daley was supposed to solve all these problems and bring order, discipline and maturity to the inner workings of the White House. Apparently I was misinformed.

I am available Mr. President please call me, I am willing to trade in one dead end job for another.

I am tired and I am disgusted and I am not sure how much more enthusiastic support I can muster up.

But, I will continue to try but please Mr. President you have to meet me half way.