There is clearly something wrong with me. Something has changed. All pistons are not firing. I am a few ants short of a picnic. The lights are on but no one is home. Shit happens and I don’t react.
Am I jaded, bitter, cynical or just so over it that I stopped caring? If so, how or why did it happen?
Let me give you some examples:
The Catholic Church festival in Roseto allows a game vendor to take shots at a cartoon of the President of The United States. I was appalled by it on many levels and after reading the good Father’s badly written and ridiculous letter to the editor giving his take on the events of that weekend I was really quite upset. But, I did not rant or rave. I did not take to Twitter, Facebook or this blog to rail against it. No. Guy and I discussed it calmly and after awhile I thought the whole affair was so foolish that I did not think I could add anything. I was certain that Lehigh Valley With Love would have done a much better job at boiling this foolishness down.
My blog idol Lehigh Valley Ramblings tries to promote a lame story about Dino Cantelmi getting away with poor driving because he is related by marriage to Bethlehem Mayor John Callahan. One of the local newspapers did not even cover the non-story and the other disproved it. This is Bethlehem: the son’s of the high and mighty always get away with everything. Did I vent to you here or on Twitter did I write a piece on yet another cheap trick by Charlie Dent? No. I commented on Bernie’s blog but I did not return to read a response.
My dear friends over at Lehigh Valley Independent have written some brilliant stuff over the summer and the only thing I feel the need to comment on is whether John Callahan is hotter than Charlie Dent.
Bill Clinton comes to town and after a brief moment of interest I forgot completely about it until I read about it the next day.
John Boehner comes to town and my only interest is how the vampire pale Charlie Dent looks standing next to the tannest man in Congress.
Lisa Boscola tells local restaurants and bars to break the law and I gave it a big yawn.
Sarah Palin said so many outrageous things this summer and made no sense what so ever each time she spoke or tweeted but all I did was shrug my shoulders and mutter things like “If that’s what America wants then that’s what they deserve.” I did not storm around the house, I did not wave my arms, and tears did not come to my eyes in rage.
Dr. Laura showed her true colors (once again) and I did not join in the discussion. I did not take to my blog to defend the First Amendment from her distortion of it. I just let the moment pass.
The media driven uproar over the non-mosque not being built at the World Trade Center site and the moron preacher burning Korans did not provoke much of a reaction from me.
I ignored Glenn Beck.
So what happened to me?
Am I so disgusted by the way the nation has turned on this President that I have given up?
Have I lost the fire in my belly? I used to love being in the arena (as TR used to call it) and lately I could take it or leave it.
To answer my own question above; I am jaded, bitter and cynical but that never stopped me from caring in the past.
Something has stopped clicking and I need to find out what it is. Any thoughts ya’ll have will be most welcome.
Thanks
Things sure are different than they were in the heady days of 2008. I am feeling a little down about things too. Maybe you will enjoy this section from Max Weber's "Politics as a Vocation," particularly the last paragraph. It always makes me feel a little better:
ReplyDeleteNow then, ladies and gentlemen, let us debate this matter once more ten years from now. Unfortunately, for a whole series of reasons, I fear that by then the period of reaction will have long since broken over us. It is very probable that little of what many of you, and (I candidly confess) I too, have wished and hoped for will be fulfilled; little--perhaps not exactly nothing, but what to us at least seems little. This will not crush me, but surely it is an inner burden to realize it. Then, I wish I could see what has become of those of you who now feel yourselves to be genuinely 'principled' politicians and who share in the intoxication signified by this revolution. It would be nice if matters turned out in such a way that Shakespeare's Sonnet 102 should hold:
Our love was new, and then but in the spring,
When I was wont to greet it with my lays;
As Philomel in summer's front doth sing,
And stops her pipe in growth of riper days.
But such is not the case. Not summer's bloom lies ahead of us, but rather a polar night of icy darkness and hardness, no matter which group may triumph externally now. Where there is nothing, not only the Kaiser but also the proletarian has lost his rights. When this night shall have slowly receded, who of those for whom spring apparently has bloomed so luxuriously will be alive? And what will have become of all of you by then? Will you be bitter or banausic? Will you simply and dully accept world and occupation? Or will the third and by no means the least frequent possibility be your lot: mystic flight from reality for those who are gifted for it, or--as is both frequent and unpleasant--for those who belabor themselves to follow this fashion? In every one of such cases, I shall draw the conclusion that they have not measured up to their own doings. They have not measured up to the world as it really is in its everyday routine. Objectively and actually, they have not experienced the vocation for politics in its deepest meaning, which they thought they had. They would have done better in simply cultivating plain brotherliness in personal relations. And for the rest--they should have gone soberly about their daily work.
Politics is a strong and slow boring of hard boards. It takes both passion and perspective. Certainly all historical experience confirms the truth --that man would not have attained the possible unless time and again he had reached out for the impossible. But to do that a man must be a leader, and not only a leader but a hero as well, in a very sober sense of the word. And even those who are neither leaders nor heroes must arm themselves with that steadfastness of heart which can brave even the crumbling of all hopes. This is necessary right now, or else men will not be able to attain even that which is possible today. Only he has the calling for politics who is sure that he shall not crumble when the world from his point of view is too stupid or too base for what he wants to offer. Only he who in the face of all this can say 'In spite of all!' has the calling for politics.
Donald, This is why I love this blog. You are disarmingly honest, even about yourself. I know I go thru phases like what you describe, but they usually last for years at a time. I'm sure you'll be on fire soon enough,and should just enjoy the peace in your heart right now.
ReplyDeleteJonathan is the person who surprises me. Rarely have I seen someone so young with such an interest in the world around him. At his age, I'm sad to say my life pretty much revolved around partying.
Thanks Gents
ReplyDeleteI have been through this before - I was 13 when I knocked on doors for McGovern-in i980 when Jimmy Carter,Jeanette Reibman & Bob Freeman lost,I was cried for months but the worst was after Bob's Senate loss in 1994 - I dropped out until 2008 and even then I was not as involved as this year.
Every time the Dems lost I never feared for the future of our republic. But, if some of these folks win this year I am afraid for our future.
I think these dopes are winning the war because they are so clear and people just want to be lead. And, Bernie your boy Charlie is an appeaser with them and you know it.
But, I am truly grateful for your response and support. Some day I hope to write as well as either of you.
Shalom