Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Must You Really Be Rude

I love blogs and I read hundreds every week. Some every day and some occasionally. I read news blogs, art blogs, gossip blogs, porn blogs, photo blogs, opinion blogs, music blogs, gay/straight and mixed blogs. But I rarely read the comments, except for Lehigh Valley Ramblings and I only read them because I post my thoughts on Bernie's really informative and entertaining site of all things Lehigh Valley.

It's not that I don't care what people are thinking, I do, otherwise why would I spend so much time reading blogs? I don't read comments because so many commenter's are rude, coarse, crude, insulting, petty, foul, nasty and often uninformed. This may come off sounding a tad snobbish or elitist but most commenter's do not know what the hell they are talking about. If they did they would not resort to the petty insults and name calling. The ones that peeve me the most are the anonymous ones. If you are going to attempt to insult me or put me down at least have the guts to sign your name or at least your first name.

I am not writing this because of something written on our comments here. Most of our commenter's have been thoughtful, funny and have added to the conversations I have been trying to start. Thank you. Also, this site hardly gets the traffic of Bernie's so we'll see what happens if I get a lot more traffic. Though if the commenter's begin to resemble an Arlen Specter town hall meeting I will begin to edit.

It's not just the political or current events blogs that get mean comments. Towleroad.com, which covers all things gay is a really wonderful and informative site. Andy Towle is pretty much a godfather of not only gay bloggers but blogging in general. His site has won every major award and deserves all the praise it gets. Last week he posted a youtube video that was fun and really delightful. Five twentysomething gay guys posted a video where they danced, lip synced and interpreted the Miley Cyrus song Party in the USA. This video was really clever and very very cute. They guys were clearly enjoying their summer vacation on Fire Island and their youth. It was campy and clever. Will it be nominated for an Oscar of best short subject? No, but it was fun. I foolishly decided to read the comments. They were just awful. Many, if not most of the comments were so hateful, mean and down right vulgar that I was actually shaken. These people took something that was so fun and light and tried to turn it into something so awful, I could not even find the words to comment myself.

Why? Why do people have to be so negative, so hateful, so coarse and crude and why do they feel compelled to share their bleak and dreary view of the world with the rest of us? Expressing strong opinions is one thing, being mean, rude or even just down right stupid is something else. Unless you are really bringing something to the conversation I really don't want to hear/read what you have to say. Calling people names, belittling them and their views does not make you smarter than them. In fact it makes you small and unworthy of my time and efforts.

I don't want a world without dissent, lord knows I loves me a good debate and I am willing to take on all comers but I will just walk away if you are confrontational or disrespectful or rude. I will not allow myself to be brought to the gutter. No one should.


  1. One one....Amen! I love reading your posts, and though most people do not read mine, it makes me feel better to get things off my "chest". I understand what you mean about negative comments, I get them with some things I do as well. People are too petty...when I see that I just say the hell with them. Keep writing, I look forward to seeing more!

  2. I visit tons of sites and when you look amongst the comments vile is the order of the day in a great many of them. But so too peppered are well informed opinions that serve to further my awareness.

    So far this has not been a major problem with mine. But then again I have very little traffic, so it only happens occasionally. And I've posted some pretty edgy opinions.

    I suppose the key is not to take most of it personally. However several bloggers posters or people who have left comments have been targeted by some real ugly comments who's goal it seems in life is to target others very personally to ruin their day.

    I wish to try very hard and leave comments wide open, but perhaps not too bad an idea to turn on comment moderation for at least a period till the simple minds lose their focus and go somewhere else to taunt.

    I don't care who you are, as soon as you speak in a group or a crowd you open yourself up to it. The folks that bash seldom will belly up and do a blog themselves where they could carry on to their hearts delight... except they fear the same will be done to them as to what they are doing. Perhaps it's better to know of these things being out there then to blind sighted by this vile, but one surely doesn't need allow it in their homes or blogs.

    Either rappers, TV, entertainment encourages it or just reflects peoples thoughts, but it sure doesn't represent mine!

    Hang In There

  3. I read more than I comment. I wonder if some comment more than they read!